If you thought chocolate butthole molds were “up your alley” (which they probably were since you live in Bushwick), then you’ll definitely want to line up at Bake Shop (no longer confusable with Cake Shop, since, like every other good music venue, it’s now closed).
For those unfamiliar with the fine art of sploshing that combines the best of the sex and baking worlds, it’s simply sitting your bare ass down on a cake. Whether the sitter chooses to let the purchaser of the cake also eat his or her asshole is entirely at the sitter’s discretion.
One of the chief cake confectioners and sitters behind Bake Shop’s latest addition to the menu, Veronica Crackbutt, a 33-year-old from Minnesota, told The Burning Bush, “I think sploshing is a great idea. It combines both performance art and infusing our cakes with ‘extra special’ ingredients. Plus, I just really like the feel of frosting in my asshole. It’s so soothing.” Splosh cakes may or may not be a limited time only option at Bake Shop, so get your taste while you can. Splosh cakes start at $300 and go up depending on how clean you expect the sitter’s crack to be.
Written by Genna Rivieccio