“Biker” Gangs Gone Bad

April 29, 2014 2 3467 Gentrification
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Just as the people of Bushwick were beginning to feel unassailable, we have once again found ourselves in the midst of perilous circumstances. Biker gangs are beginning to form in the neighborhood as a result of unified malevolence toward the unfavorable wavering of conditions.
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We know what you’re probably thinking and you’re likely wrong. Actual bicyclists, not the guys that ride Harleys, are going around on bikes and plowing down unsuspecting pedestrians on the streets of Bushwick, traveling in packs and leaving their victims for dead… or at the very least with tire marks and bruises across their faces. We had a chance to sit down and converse with ringleader Kip Boyano of the Psycho Cyclists, a Bushwick “biker” gang that is notorious for their vicious and reprehensible behavior. “Any of these stupid hipster fuckface n00bz that are reading this, this message is for you: we’re tired of all your shit! We asked nicely before for everyone to cut it out, but no more. We want BLOOD!!”
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We aren’t entirely positive what the demands of the Psycho Cyclists or the affiliated gangs are, but it is possible that they are just extremely irate that an increasing number of people are clogging up the streets and getting in the way of their bikes. Although these gangs don’t ride motorcycles, they share some of the same business tactics used in groups such as the Hell’s Angels, extorting free drinks and food from local bars and businesses. It is also rumored that they are involved in the prostitution ring that has been taking place at Happy Fun Hideaway.

Steer clear.

Steer clear.

When they aren’t assaulting innocent civilians on their death machines, they can usually be found at Wreck Room, aggressively stuffing their faces with delicious ragu rice balls from Arancini Bros. There is no real way to be safe, but if the madness continues, then people may want to begin to consider wearing helmets anytime they leave their apartment or loft.

Written By Nicole Benson
Photo Credits: jimlangley.blogspot.com, anthonylukephotography.blogspot.com

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