Bushwickian Wins “Williamsburg Air,” Finds Out It’s Trapped Fart

July 10, 2015 2 499 Hipster Commentary, News

It’s the new items that’s been making its rounds on various Brooklyn-centric websites this past week. So if you haven’t heard about it, you obviously have a life. Any who, an eBay seller who may or not be a Williamsburgite, has decided to take business acumen into his own hands (let’s just assume it’s a man) and sell what was thought to be “air” for $40–the bids have since risen to over $20k.

Turns out, it's just a fart

Turns out, it’s just a fart

The person willing to outbid the highest crackpot? A Bushwickian named Grace Aspirant, a 22-year-old who just moved here from Georgia on her father’s trust fund. “You can imagine my horrah when I received the so-called bag of ‘air,’ took a deep whiff of it and smelled the most foul fart of my life,” wailed Aspirant.

Who wouldn't want to take in this air?

Who wouldn’t want to take in this air?

Needless to stay, the socialite got eBay involved, or rather she got her Dorota involved, to handle the situation and see to it that the seller never logs on to the auction website again. “I used to think I wanted to live in Williamsburg after I used Bushwick as a starter kit. Now I know: that place is awful,” Aspirant commented. In the meantime, she has been seeking therapy for the trauma she suffered as a result of this entire ordeal.

Written by Genna Rivieccio