Commonly Overheard in Bushwick: “You Said You Were Gonna Leave That Door Unlocked So I Could Get Into Your Bedroom.”

September 29, 2016 Comments Off on Commonly Overheard in Bushwick: “You Said You Were Gonna Leave That Door Unlocked So I Could Get Into Your Bedroom.” 289 News
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Commonly Overheard in Bushwick is an occasional series we write whenever we hear something someone actually said on the streets or in the businesses of Bushwick. This is not to be confused with the Tumblr of a similar name.

There are all manner of nocturnal activities we’ll never know about that go on in Bushwick. However, catching the “snatch” of conversation that consisted of “You said you were gonna leave that door unlocked so I could get into your bedroom” indicates a very specific brand of naughtiness.

Leave that door open

Leave that door open

One with a naturally perverse mind might associate this lament over not being able to “enter” with some sort of sexual tomfoolery, and they would be right. It appeared as though the guy expressing disdain over this locked door situation was trying to fulfill one, Basique Beech‘s rape fantasy that she had hired him to perform after trolling that old school medium, Craig’s List.

He wanted to creep in, but couldn't

He wanted to creep in, but couldn’t

“I guess I was too high at the time to remember that he couldn’t do the job I paid him for without the door being left open,” explained a blue-ovaried Beech. He called me about twenty times before I realized my phone was even ringing. I didn’t think phones could even ring anymore. Anyway, I’m always going to leave my door unlocked from now on, robbery baiting be damned.”

Written by Genna Rivieccio

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