Fine & Raw Makes Dick-Shaped Chocolates With Santa Hats on Them for Xmas Season

December 9, 2014 2 4190 Food, News
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With a name like Fine & Raw, it’s no wonder the chocolate makers at this establishment have decided to get down and dirty with their sweet treat offerings this holiday season. The master chocolate maker at the factory, Rodolfe Wiquide, a 38-year-old with years of experience as a chocolatier in the south of France, spoke¬†with The Burning Bush about the process behind his intricate dick-shaped chocolates with Santa hats on them that will be for sale at Fine & Raw through December 31st.

Standard Fine & Raw packaging

Standard Fine & Raw packaging

“I know that for zee Bushwickians, zee dick is an important symbol of joy. And so I thought, you know, thees would be a good time of year to celebrate that. And the Santa hat is obviously to add a festive touch.” Wiquide has already received a mixture of responses ranging from elation to moral outrage. The resident feminazis of Bushwick, We the Femmes, have already been protesting outside the factory for the past few days. But that hasn’t stopped other residents, like Shannon Coklust, a 28-year-old hair stylist, from enjoying the dick-shaped fare.

Before Wiquide adds the Santa hat to the dick-shaped chocolate he lets the creamy filling ooze out

Before Wiquide adds the Santa hat to the dick-shaped chocolate he lets the creamy filling ooze out

“I’m, not to use a cliche, like a kid in a candy store. I can’t get enough dick. I’ve been back here every day since they first released these limited edition masterpieces,” Coklust commented. Across the board, this seems to be the general reaction, especially among Bushwick women, Svetlana Opinmauth included. “I love what a great opportunity this has given me to practice my blow job skills on such a life-like prototype. And the chocolate tastes delicious, too!” Opinmauth exclaimed. With such addictive tendencies in the works, it might be Bushwick’s fattest season yet.

Written by Genna Rivieccio

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