As it becomes increasingly out of fashion to not use one’s possessions and food items “sustainably,” it was only a matter of time before the fast fashion world decided to divert accusations of being uncaring fucks that only want what’s best for their sweatshops.
That’s why a new fabric called Mestic (as in mest your pants, maybe?), made from “components” of cow manure is taking the likes of H&M by storm–and now, Friends and Beacon’s Closet, both of which are taking a break from their former conglomerate empire as collaboration is really not what anyone with a vanity project wants, are doing the same.
One of the five managers at both Friends and Beacon’s, Lucy Goosay, a 26-year-old from Delaware, told The Burning Bush, “We’re trying to get a leg up on these other clothing corporations before they ‘graft’ the manure trend solely for themselves. Because really all boutiques and thrift stores have going for them is the notion of recyclability. Of course, we’ll need to open up our own factory near Boar’s Head to be able to make the ‘extractions’ and manufacture our own line of manure couture. Does it mean somewhat detracting from the definition of ‘used’? Sure. But competition is competition.” Stay tuned for a manure-based article of clothing on a rack in Bushwick near you. In any case, you probably already smell like shit anyway.
Written by Genna Rivieccio