It’s no secret that Bushwickians have some pretty fucking weird shit in the furniture and decor department. The more obscure and horrendous to the eye, the better. The various moving “companies” of Bushwick (mainly Mudanzas and forcing Bushwick Car Service to wait while you load your three suitcases into the trunk) are, unfortunately, sick and tired of putting up with our absurd tastes–especially after one of the movers for Mudanzas had to get his foot amputated upon dropping a futurist dresser on his foot.
The owner of the dresser, Alissa Bandwagon, had recently seen the futurism exhibit at the Guggenheim and was inspired to buy one of her own. She was previously living on the Upper East Side while attending Hunter College to major in the History of Art from 1900 to 1980. A bro at the Pine Box recommended she move to Bushwick, sealing the fate of the mover, Reynaldo Garcia, the 32-year-old father of three whose foot had to be removed at Woodhull.
While Bandwagon was mildly contrite over spurring a strike that stipulates movers will only agree to carry furniture purchased from Ikea, she seemed a little too self-satisfied as she told The Burning Bush, “That dresser is the crowning piece in my loft space.” Mudanzas could not be reached for comment, leading us to remain somewhat unclear on the specific terms of the strike beyond the Ikea furniture demand.
Written by Genna Rivieccio