If you’re not already familiar with the controversy surrounding the Bushwick Coffee Shop (not to be confused with the Bushwick Coffee House, which has taken a lot of heat merely for being named similarly) on Wilson Avenue, you’re either not into coffee or aloof when it comes to matters of religion. Whatever the case for your oblivion, an anti-Semitic rant from the owner of the establishment in which the term “greedy infiltrators” was used has resulted in a recent surge in the presence of neo-Nazis in the neighborhood.
The Burning Bush spoke with John Whitebred, a 20-year-old neo-Nazi who just moved in at the corner of Wilson and Knickerbocker. “When I heard how open this community was to heiling Hitler, I knew it was going to be the perfect place for me to settle in with my buddies.” Whitebred, originally from North Carolina, brought in a slew of said “buddies” into a giant duplex with him, signaling an alarming trend in the permeation of this particular sect of humanity into Bushwick.
Another anti-Semitic zealot, Robbie Juhayturr, a 23-year-old who spends much of his time at the Westside Rifle & Pistol Range, added, “We like to hang out at Cain’s and just sort of intimidate people with our presence and let them know we’re not about non-whites.” Juhayturr added, “I don’t even get why people are offended by the comment. Only gentiles drink coffee anyway.” Measures to expunge this strain of resident in the area have already begun, with a number of Hasidic landlords organizing a covert attack with Stars of David used as death stars to run the neo-Nazis out of Bushwick. As usual, we’ll keep you updated on any impending bloodbaths.
Written by Genna Rivieccio