New Chastity Belt Store, Chastity’s Boner, Opens On Stockholm Street

July 10, 2014 2 2638 Gentrification, Local Business, News, Sexuality
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With the recent abstinence contagion on the rise, a wealthy Turkish woman named Beelzebub Capitalikst has quickly taken advantage of the unprecedented demand for chastity belts. Her new store, Chastity’s Boner (named, of course in honor of Cher’s son/daughter), provides sexually abstaining Bushwickians with myriad choices in the world of chastity belts–including some tantalizing vintage pieces that are sure to keep you on lockdown no matter how tempted you get.

Vintage chastity belt from the mid-1600s, on sale at Chastity's Boner for $10,500

Vintage chastity belt from the mid-1600s, on sale at Chastity’s Boner for $10,500

Capitalikst stated to The Burning Bush, “I just saw a market that wasn’t being tapped into, and I wanted to help give people what they needed.” Capitalikst’s intentions aren’t all “pure,” though. She’s also recently opened a sex shop called Rammed on New York’s far more debauched Lower East Side. Clearly an unapologetic profiteering businesswoman (I know, I know–that’s not a word), Capitalikst was open about her fears that “the chastity belt trend [will] fade out” and she’ll have to “return to Turkey in shame.” So if you care about Caitalikst’s honor and protecting your genitals from penetration, buy a chastity belt from Chastity’s Boner, located at 854 Stockholm Street off the Dekalb L.

Written by Genna Rivieccio

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