Owl Juice Pub on Willoughby Avenue and Starr Street is under fire after accusations arose of the juice bar slipping some particularly potent extra ingredients into their beverages and serving them to unbeknownst customers. News of the allegations began circulating the Bushwick realm after 26-year-old Melinda Frecklestein was hospitalized yesterday afternoon when she went into cardiac arrest less than an hour after getting her third juice of the day from Owl Juice Pub. When she arrived at the hospital, amphetamines were found in her system.
Frecklestein, who is currently on probation for drug related charges, has recently been suspected by some of her fellow Bushwickians of lying about the source of the amphetamines that ended up in her system in order to avoid jail time for violation of probation. However, likely due to the overwhelming high quantity of conspiracy theorists living in Bushwick, most people in the community are siding with Frecklestein and want nothing more than to see Owl Juice Pub shut down for good.
Melinda Frecklestein is currently in stable condition at Woodhull Medical and Mental Health Center, where the Burning Bush paid her a visit earlier this evening. “Yeah, I’m totally gonna to call my lawyer as soon as I get out of this shit hole,” Frecklestein told us while puffing on a cigarette in her hospital bed. “If I can manage to squeeze out any money from Bird Juice or whatever it’s called, then I could totally pay off my probation.” Although the testimony of Frecklestein is somewhat questionable, it may be in the best interest of those with high blood pressure and heart problems to linger on the side of caution pending the investigation.
Written by Nicole Benson