Pervs, MILF-Seekers Schlep From Bushwick to See Breastfeeding Demonstration in Times Square Over Weekend

August 7, 2017 0 100 News
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While the dreary weather of today might have washed away all the perversion of the weekend, it was only just yesterday that many a Bushwickian male decided to make the unprecedented schlep to Times Square to watch the grossly named The Big Latch On a.k.a a demonstration of women with babies allowing said spawn to suck on their tits out on the open. What man could resist such an opportunity–least of all the typically lazy and hungover Bushwick-based one?

The scene that launched a thousand train rides

“Basically the only thing that could ever get me hard relating to parenthood is the sight of a woman with a baby attached to her breast. It really makes me want to impregnate someone–or at least, someone I actually know I impregnated before she decided to take Plan B,” commented Tyler Wang, a 29-year-old freelance graphic designer who made the journey in spite of having to go to Midtown for his job during the weekdays.

Bushwickian men will commute for titty sightings

The moms expressing their right to legally breastfeed in public, however, were not immune to the ogling eyes of Bushwickian outsiders, men and women included. Local lesbian Shelby Bukake, a 25-year-old who bartends at Silent Barn, bashfully defended, “I just wanna see what’s out there, areola size wise.” And so she did, along with every other perv in town–the moms showcasing themselves included.

Written by Genna Rivieccio

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