If you’re not already familiar with the terrorization of the Psycho Cyclists biker gang, then you surely were after this weekend. Kip Boyano, the ringleader of the group, was enraged over the fact that this event was moved from Bed-Stuy to Bushwick for its eleventh year.
For those unseasoned in the nature of Bike Kill, it essentially consists of biking aggressively at other people while jousting. Obviously, the Psycho Cyclists were none too pleased with this infiltration into their territory, not only because it’s their turf, but because no one is allowed to be tougher than their bike gang. In order to remedy the situation, Boyano and his right-hand girl/girlfriend, Sally Sledgehammer, a 19-year-old from Baltimore, gathered their rag tag squad and stormed the Jefftown area where Bike Kill was taking place over the weekend.
In the aftermath lie nothing but dismembered body parts, unidentifiable innards and a river of blood. The sole survivors, Frankie Chinstrap and Wally Wallop, spoke frankly to The Burning Bush about the carnage they inflicted. Chinstrap insisted, “It had to be done. Bitches need to know their place.” Wallop added, “Now that Sally’s dead, I just want everyone to know she was carrying my baby.” Cleanup of the bloodshed may take another few days, so be wary of wading through blood, etc.–especially during these ebola-laden times.
Written by Genna Rivieccio
Photo Credits: Gothamist