Roberta’s Waitstaff Required to Be Mute While Serving

February 27, 2015 4 660 Local Business, News, Pizza, Restaurants
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Any regular or semi-regular Roberta’s attendee knows that it’s the accepted norm to get treated like a peon while seated in the “elite” restaurant. Part of said treatment is the servers not talking to you at all, seemingly reduced to a state of catatonia as they nod yes or no regarding whether or not they recommend something. And while you may have written this off as standard bougie restaurant (by Bushwick standards) comportment, The Burning Bush recently discovered that there¬†is, in fact, a reason for the rudeness.

The Roberta's waitstaff motto

The Roberta’s waitstaff motto

An anonymous ex-employee came forward to reveal the true motive behind the silent methods of the Roberta’s waitstaff. “Long ago, we were instructed not to speak lest it came back to haunt us later. Whether this included off-handed references to our secret recipes–you know, the ones not featured in the cookbook–or allusions to how we felt about management, an especially pertinent topic right now, it was made clear to us that not saying anything at all was the best approach to dealing with the public.”

"I mostly took cues from Jennifer Aniston in Office Space regarding the best expressive hand gestures to make toward customers."

“I mostly took cues from Jennifer Aniston in Office Space regarding the best expressive hand gestures to make toward customers.”

Even the highest rollers at Roberta’s aren’t given the courtesy of being spoken to. A simple series of glances, head tilts and hand gestures is the extent to which even the biggest spender at the establishment will receive. “It’s for our own protection. With all the competitors and enemies we have, we can’t take chances letting what we say be used against us,” concluded the former server, now a member of the Roberta’s Witness Protection Program set up to accommodate fired or displaced workers of the enterprise.

Written by Genna Rivieccio

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