We’ve all been subjected to that one roommate unwilling to do his or her portion to make the apartment look just a little bit shittier than it is. Well, one roommate pushed another roommate a hair too far last night after finding the sink filled with crusted dishes (like semen-level crusted).
In any case, the perpetrating stabber, Marlena Bugato, a 34-year-old who has been feeling a lot like neighborhood trash lately thanks to getting a little bit older and having to suddenly come to terms with all these new-fangled folks coming in and taking over her so-called territory, reacted in an extreme way to her 24-year-old roommate, Fenton Frere, a freelance graphic designer, ignoring her multiple requests to clean up the goddamn sink.
“Look, I didn’t mean to kill him or nothin’, I just wanted to scare him a little. Can I help it if I hit a vital organ? Serves that asshole right for not doing his part.” This official comment from Bugato should give any non-dish washers a fair warning.
Written by Genna Rivieccio