With the Williamsburg effect in full swing right now, it’s to be expected that local mom, Abra Sive, would organize a stroller swap for young millennial parents who already have toddlers that have outgrown their strollers, high chairs and whatever other grab bag of shit babies need. As a kept mother of four, Sive saw the opportunity to somehow fill her day by coordinating the upcoming event, to be called Baby’s Off the Bottle, at Bat Haus.
Upon discussing the stroller swap with Sive, who identifies herself as “an old 26,” we found that it was somewhat terrifying to imagine what having Sive as a mother would be like. Some statements were more alarming than others, like, “My kids’ names are Brooklyn, Clinton, Boerum and New York–after Tiffany Pollard though, not the city.” When we attempted to ask what her reasoning behind throwing the event was, she glazed over momentarily and mumbled, “I wanna meet more dads.”
Baby’s Off the Bottle will be held every Saturday at 10 p.m.–long after Brooklyn, Clinton, Boerum and New York have gone to bed–and will include an open bar to distract parents from the fact that most of these recycled baby items are a little more than “gently used.” Plus, it will give Sive and other mid-20s moms a chance to troll the single dad meat market.
Written by Genna Rivieccio