Just when you thought riding the L train couldn’t get any worse, turns out, it can. The MTA is making drastic schedule changes, including no service after midnight from the Bushwick to Manhattan area (but then, why would you want to go to Manhattan? To be reminded of work?).
Nonetheless, certain delusional Bushwickians are convinced that if they will the L train to move while they’re on it after midnight, they can still get to and from Bushwick. Liam Mountainmover, a 25-year-old Irishman, had been sitting on a stopped L train for about an hour since 1 a.m. when he finally screamed, “Function, goddamn you, function!”
Needless to say, the L train never did function. And yet Mountainmover is just one of the legions convinced that this has got to be some elaborate hoax designed to test one’s patience levels. “I really thought the train was gonna move,” said former L train rider Melinda Leery, who recently made the tragic switch to the M train. “It never left the station, but I think one of the final shreds of my sanity did.”
Written by Genna Rivieccio