Tiki Disco Reported to be Original Site of Sodom and Gomorrah

April 25, 2014 Comments Off on Tiki Disco Reported to be Original Site of Sodom and Gomorrah 3678 J'Accuse, News
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Tiki Disco may have a number of different locations at any given time throughout the year. However, it’s primary location, the one that people actually give a shit about going to, is the one occasionally held during the summer at 261 Moore Street a.k.a. Roberta’s (Bushwick’s Big Brother-like establishment that you can read more about here).

The horded masses of Tiki Disco

The horded masses of Tiki Disco

Recently, students from the Center for Ancient Studies at NYU went on a recreational dig in Roberta’s backyard. Although the excavation was really just supposed to be a fun experiment, students discovered some highly convincing findings that have led them to believe 261 Moore was the original site of Sodom and Gomorrah.

Tiki Disco in 2013

Tiki Disco in 2013

In the past, archaeologists have maintained that the cities were situated near the Jordan River. But this new evidence contradicts the theory. Deemed the epicenter of impenitence and ultimate vice, it makes sense that one of the primary sites of Tiki Disco would turn out to be the original Sodom and Gomorrah.

The devil-horned participants of Tiki Disco would have fit right in at Sodom and Gomorrah

The devil-horned participants of Tiki Disco would have fit right in at Sodom and Gomorrah

When The Burning Bush attempted to interview NYU student Neena Falarsi on what was found, she shuddered and said, “I cannot talk about that.” We’re guessing it’s nothing we haven’t seen in Bushwick before though. A few dirty syringes here, some unidentifiable body parts there. Big deal. But this is surely going to force the organizers of Tiki Disco to up the ante on their sin promotion.

Written by Genna Rivieccio, avoider of Tiki Disco

 

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