If we’re being totally honest with one another, a white people block party is decidedly different from a black people block party. What’s the main difference, you ask? The noise level, of course. On Sunday, August 24th (incidentally the date of Sylvia Plath’s first suicide attempt in 1953–a fun white person’s fact for you), Little Skip’s attempted to have a ribald block party that went largely unnoticed by passersby who just assumed it was a random congregation of Caucasians.
The organizer of the block party, Whitney Melba, lamented to The Burning Bush, “I though softly playing pop music and a few canapés would be enough to get the party started and keep the momentum going, but it was like no one even knew we were there.” A Little Skip’s employee who witnessed the sad get-together stated, “I though I might cry when I saw someone bring out a limbo pole to make things more exciting.” Melba added, “I don’t think I’ll be throwing another one of these until I make some black friends I can invite.” No one else in attendance could be reached for comment as they’re all pretending this never happened.
Written by Genna Rivieccio