Why Have Cocaine When You Can Have Coffee? Asks Owner of New Coffee Shop, Caffaine

November 9, 2014 2 1476 Drugs, Local Business, News

Bushwick can’t seem to not veer toward the scandalous when it comes to its coffee shops. Considering cafes are the hub of faux activity for both baristas and freelancers alike, it’s only natural that business owners are constantly trying to one-up each other by coming up with a gimmick that will attract customers. The latest addition to the ever-expanding amount of coffee shops in the neighborhood is Caffaine, owned by former Swedish expatriate, Sven Drugaddikt, a 39-year-old who prefers cocaine and vodka to coffee.

Coffee's not so different from cocaine according to local coffee shop owner, Sven Drugaddikt

Coffee’s not so different from cocaine according to local coffee shop owner, Sven Drugaddikt

When asked what made Drugaddikt want to open Caffaine, located off the Dekalb stop just two blocks from Variety, Drugaddikt told The Burning Bush, “I’ve been trying to channel my passion for drugs into coffee. If caffeine is classified as a drug, then I can make it even more potent with my ‘specialty blends.’ I also know that the only successful business in Bushwick is a bar or a coffee shop–or Roberta’s. So I wanted to hedge my bets with the money I had with a sure gamble. And with my coke-like coffee, I know there’s going to be a line around the door.”

Drink Caffaine coffee at your own risk

Drink Caffaine coffee at your own risk

While Drugaddikt wouldn’t elaborate on what was so unique about his coffee, we’re assuming that it’s got to have at least a gram of cocaine mixed in with every batch of the grounds. So yeah, you should definitely cancel whatever plans you had to snort coke on the weekend and just do it during the day–in true Bushwickian form. Though, don’t forget that you still have to support your local drug dealer if you don’t want the Bushwick economy to completely collapse.

Written by Genna Rivieccio